When you talk negatively to yourself or put yourself or your achievements down, stop and ask yourself ‘would I say this to another person, to a friend?’ If not, why am I saying it to myself? We as people are our own harshest critics but we need to learn how to praise ourselves and give ourselves a bit more credit.

You should try and develop positive statements you can say to yourself to replace negative thoughts. For example, if you have the following thought ‘I always make mistakes’ then you can flip this around and the thought becomes ‘there are many things that I do well.’ If the thought is ‘I am not worthy of anything’ flip this around to ‘I am a valuable person.’

Changing negative thoughts into positive ones takes time and repetition but just like with affirmations, the more often you practice, the more you will start to believe them. An extra tip on this point is to write down five positive thoughts about yourself on paper and stick them where you will see them often to be reminded, places like the fridge or a mirror are great for this. It won’t be easy at first, but really think about five things that you like or even love about yourself, it could be anything from your smile to the way you like to help others, just make it specific to you.

2. Recognise strengths for self-worth

Another great way to gain some confidence is recognising your strengths and talents and concentrating on those. Not everyone will be amazing at everything and that’s okay, it’s important to accept what we are capable of and what our limitations are and most of all, to be happy with that.

Sometimes to find out what your thing is, you have to first find out what it isn’t, and that’s ok too. If you are great at something, keep at it, if you have just broken a new record at work, tell someone, if you have a talent, share this with others, people’s reactions will boost you up and it’s not arrogant or obnoxious to be proud of yourself, you should be! Some self-praise will go a long way to building some self-worth.

3. Keep a gratitude journal

Whenever I get a nice email from a client, some good feedback or a thank you email from management, I save these into a folder on my laptop. If I get a card from someone or a thank you note, I save them. If someone gives me a compliment I remember it. If I am having a bad day or being too harsh on myself, I can open up this folder and see all these lovely things that people have said and it gives a lovely little self-esteem ‘pick me up.

Another variation of this is to keep a journal where you write down nice things people have said or done for you and then you refer to this journal when you are having a bad day.

4. Set goals for self-worth

Consider your interests, things that bring you joy and things that keep you motivated. Also, think about the things you want, where you want your life to go or what you would do more of if you could, once you’ve thought about some ideas, set yourself some goals.

Some basic examples to give you an idea; look in the mirror every day and think of something you like about yourself, stand up for yourself in a meeting where you normally wouldn’t have any input, to stop texting that ex (we’ve all been there), to only think positive things about yourself for that day, to finally take the step and look for a new job, or something as simple as saying hello to a stranger.

Whatever it is, make sure you keep track of your successes and goals. Every night before bed try to reflect on your day, write down one thing that you achieved that day that you are proud of and then also write down one thing you want to achieve the next day.

The more often you do this, the more you will get in the habit of looking for the positives in a day, rather than the negatives. This will also give you the foundation to set bigger goals for yourself as time moves on.

5. Care for yourself

If you are struggling with self-worth or self-esteem, you may not feel like taking care of yourself or giving yourself any extra attention, but self-love is crucial and if you want to show confidence on the outside, you need to feel it on the inside.

Take care of your physical health and wellness. Try and eat healthy nutritious foods. Move your body; when you exercise and eat well on a regular basis, you will start to feel happier and healthier, which in turn will promote more positive energy.

Remember to take time off when you are stressed, it’s much better to say no to something and re-charge than it is to keep going for fear of letting people down, only to experience burnout later on anyway.

Don’t be afraid to ask for what you want, stand up for yourself and do not let other people push you down, the most important person is you.

I hope all these self-worth tips help and that you are able to use these to start building some self- worth.

To quote Dalai Lama - “With realisation of one’s own potential & self-confidence in one’s ability, one can build a better world.”